To make a difference.

Not a lot of people truly impress me, but this week I have found a new hero. There is a man who thinks that one man can make a difference. A man who thinks that you have to shoot for the moon to reach for the stars. A man who accepts being considered a pain in the ass if that leads to vital change. A man who cares, not just about the mission of the bigger picture, but about the people.

This man is a chef. And he has taken all his talent and fame from that and put to use things that he truly believes in. He has made changes in the food habits in British Schools and in Huntington, Virginia in America. He has through his restaurant program Fifteen given kids that are about to fall out of society's normal realm a chance of getting a profession and life to be proud of.

This impresses me. That way of thinking, that nothing is impossible - and if it would be impossible then only admitting that after trying hundred times to find a way to make it work, that impresses me. The way of getting the best out of the knowledge that you have, and turning yourself into a force of good. That impresses me, and inspires me.

Let's take the inspiration and look at ourselves and what we can do. It doesn't have to do with food, or being famous. We can all work in our own ways to change our world to a better place.

To see my source of inspiration, check out Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution on a tv near you...

or check it out online here

A cup of tea.

Dricka te i stora koppar. Ingen mjölk. Inget socker. Bara teets färg som djupnar i koppens avlägsna botten. Den stora koppen fylld med den varma drycken.

Problemet som uppstår är att hinna dricka upp innan teet kallnat.

Te ska njutas långsamt. Den stora koppen ståendes på fönsterkarmen mellan klunkarna. Pauser då sida läggs till sida i romanen i mitt knä. Eller så vilar koppen i mina händer medan min blick söker sig bort. En kopp te kan inte stressas.

Men sitter man ju där med en kall slatt.

Den stora koppens botten täcks av kallt te som ger en bitter chock till den intet ont anande munnen då en ny klunk intas. Vad är då lösningen på detta? Att byta till en mindre kopp? En kopp som inte alls ger samma känsla som en stor, men som är mer praktisk. Eller leva med den stora koppen och då låta obehaget av det kallnade teet i munnen bli den avslutande uppleveslen på tedrickandet?

Jag dricker alltid mitt te i en stor kopp om det är möjligt. Möjligheten att teet håller sig varmt alldeles perfekt länge och jag hinner njuta hela mina stora kopp te finns ju också.

Let's Get Retarded. Let's Get The Party Started.

Weekend is coming up so here's one of my absolute favourite getting in party mood songs to get you all in the right mood!

Progress.

Today I made the first of my goals when it come to my running. I managed to run through my whole program, no walking! I got inspiration from my music and pushed through the pain, and the feeling of making it is great.

Psych returns.

Today I would like to share some very important information. Tomorrow one of the best comedy series ever returns, the fifth season of Psych starts! Don't miss it. And if you don't know what I am talking about, then you have some great catching up to do.

Hotel showers.

I have a complaint. I know that this complaint is anti environmental friendly, but I don't care. I do think that it is good that all of us are trying to make changes to make sure that our earth will stay alive and kicking. And I do think that it is really good that also big companies are making these changes, because just private individuals will not be enough. But all these efforts has lead to that it is almost impossible for me to have clean hair if I am staying at a hotel. The showers are insanely weak, and with my long and thick hair it takes forever to rinse both shampoo and conditioner (which in the long run can't be good for mother nature either). After that I will need to dry my hair, and does that work? No not really. In one hotel the hair dryer worked for about 2 minutes on high effect before it turned it self off. And it took 5 minutes until it worked at all again! Now I am bringing my own hair dryer to at least have that problem solved. And mainly I am trying to have clean hair before I depart for a night away. But it is a frustration problem, that I also realise is a very luxury problem to have.

Running update.

Earlier this summer I wrote about my running aspirations and I was thinking it is time for an update. Some parts of the running has been going very well.

The method of focusing my running program around the music has been very good. I have realised that I very much prefer running a specific time instead of running a specific distance. If I know that I have to run just two more songs it is motivating me. The music that I chose was also very good, I have now made a few changes, mainly in the warm up part, to make it even better.

When it comes to the actual running it has been though but not horrible as I have felt before. I have been able to push myself a bit every time and the feeling of being able to do a little bit more every time is such a great feeling. I have managed to get my running step back ( is it even called like that in English?) and it does even at some times feels really nice to run, so that's quite amazing.

The problem has been to get out and actually doing it. When I have started it has been okay, but then I have had periods where I have been travelling or had visitors and then I get out of the rhythm of working out and then a lot of time passes between the occasions I run. So it hasn't been that many times that I have been out yet. But I'm gonna keep on working on it. It is a good way to work out, and it is practical because you can do it everywhere as long as you bring some clothes and shoes.

My running songs:
Warm-up:
Prayer for the weekend - The Ark
Fame - Naturi Naughton
Fairytale gone bad - Sunrise Avenue
Strech:
You are beautiful - James Blunt
Main work-out:
Walking on sunshine - Katarina and the Waves
Womanizer - Britney Spears
Anxiety - Black Eyed Peas
Big City Nights - Scorpions
Goodbye - Christina Debarge
Overload - Voodoo & Serano
Strech:
Like the sun - RyanDan
This is my life - Anna Bergendal
Thank you - Dido

Follow me home.

Take off.

Work injuries. We all have them. And I do not mean the physical injuries we can get while working. I am talking about the ways our work damage our minds. The way we get all nerdy, usually without really noticing, about things related to our job. It is normal, and it is okay. My new job has opened a new world up for me. I am fascinated with thing I haven't really even considered before. Airports and most of all planes. Most of all I have started to love the moment of take off. Both to watch it and the feel it. It fascinates me that the speed is creating such a lifting force to get the planes up in the air. And to feel the aircraft lift from the ground, just amazing!

Picture from boeing.com

The End of An Era -The Last of LOST.

6 years ago there was a buzz. A buzz about that something was coming. Something extraordinary. Something that would rewrite television history. That something was the tv-series LOST. And last Sunday the last chapter was shown and the book is now closed.

I watch more tv-series than most people I know. And I for sure watch more tv-series than I do movies. The easy answer to why that is would be that one episode of a tv-show is 42 minutes long, and a movie is much longer. I get restless to commit to something longer than 42 minutes. The argument against that is of course that a tv-series much more time in the long run. If I have counted right LOST consist of 121 episodes. And then I am not counting the recap episodes that some seasons starts with. So yes, that is a lot more commitment time wise than a movie.

I am now going to argue that this is the point. The 121x42 minutes that I have spent watching LOST is so much more than just entertainment, education or even intellectual challenge. I have spent this time not just watching the characters of the show. I have spent this time getting to know them. I have spent this time laughing with them, crying with them, being scared with them and having adventures with them. I have spent this time living and loving with them. I know them. Turning on an episode of a tv-show you have been following for a long time is like visiting friends. Or at least it should be, because to me this is the measurement of a really good tv-show.

I have visited my friends on the Island for 6 years time. I was there when the plane crashed, both the first and the second time. I was there when Jack and Kate met and she was sawing up his wound. I was there when Walt was kidnapped, when Boone, Shannon, Libby, Ana-Lucia, Charlie and so many more died. I was there with them, with Jack, Kate, Sawyer, Hurley, Ben, Desmond, Penny, Sun, Jin, Juliet, Lapidus and all the other, during all this time. And now it is over, the end has come.

So what do I have to say about the end? Did I love it? Did I hate it? Most of all I feel empty. I've lost them. There will be no more visits, no more new adventures together. That is as it should be, but it is still sad in a way. Except the sadness. I did love it. I was a perfect ending in the whole. Almost question was answered, and the ones that wasn't doesn't feel that important now. I think that tv-blogger Kristin pre-lost post, I can understand the connections that my own mind would have needed a little bit more time to consider before tying them all up.

My other comments on the last of LOST is:

• NO to Jack&Kate and Sawyer&Juliet. That was the wrong final match!
• Also NO to Shannon being Sayids true love. That is not realistic, to me Nadia was he's true love, even though he also loved Shannon.
• YES to Hurley being the new guardian of the Island.
• YES to all the things happening on the Island being real.
• YES to showing that what is at the core of the show is a love story.

I could go on with this post for a very long time. LOST is extraordinary, in so many ways. But I think it's time to follow Damon Lindelof's words:

"Remember. Let go. Move on."

Thank you.

COPinion.

We are working on a project. A great idea that hopefully will become reality. We have been working behind the curtain for a while now. But now we are also really on the way in to the open.:

copinion.dk

where the action will be...

Running aspirations.

I have had some problems matching my new working schedule with a good work out schedule. I have quite a lot of nights away, and the result of that is that some weeks the only days I can go to the gym is when I have days off and that doesn't always work too good. So my solution to this is to start running. I can just pack some training clothes and shoes and run in Aalborg or where I might be. The only problem is that I don't really like to run. The last 15 years I have been running about once every second year or so. That's usually how long it takes for me to forget how much I dislike it. But this time I have a plan. First of all I do have a purpose with the running, if I go running when I'm away, I'll have more time for other things on my free days. Secondly I have made music lists specially for the running. So that I have music that I like and that has a good tempo to run to. And thirdly I am starting easily. I have made in total 4 different music lists. With a couple of warm up songs and then songs with different tempo for a mix of high pulse training and recovery in between. My first work out program is 10 minutes warm up, 20 minutes of running/walking and 5-10 minutes of cool down and stretching in the end. It feels doable at this point. I am wishing my self the best of luck!

Robin Hood.

This summer a new Robin Hood movie is hitting the theatres. That should be something for me. It is just this kind of movies that I like best. Adventure movies, with a base in a legend. But I am just not convinced. But why not? I do like Ridley Scott. I think that Cate Blanchett is amazing. I do like Russell Crowe. And I do think that the movie seems to look really cool. But I'm just not buying it. Maybe there's been to many Robin Hood movies and series. Or maybe Crowe and Blanchett are just too old. I mean seriously, in my mind Robin Hood is not 50 years old. And I do want some one young and hot to look at in this kind of movie. Okay, that might sound shallow, but then I am, I can live with that. So all of this considered, I have to say that I wount see the new Robin Hood movie.



But do you remember some of the other ones? Who in our generation haven't seen the 1991 Kevin Costner version? That was a great movie. Even though the scenery is quite crappy it did have a Kevin Costner in his prime, a really cool Marian, a teen-idol Christian Slater (yes yes I loved him too) and one of the coolest bad guys ever in brilliant Alan Rickmans Sheriff of Nottingham. And of course the theme song by Bryan Adams. That was a good Robin Hood movie!



But I also have to confess to liking the most ridiculous Robin Hood ever; Robin Hood - men in tights... It's just a really funny movie!



Maybe it's just time for a Robin Hood movie night soon.

Sense or sensibility.

We are all different. In the way we approach life. In the way we deal with the things we meet on our journeys. In the way we deal with the people that cross our ways. I think most of us can be divided in to base our decision on sense or sensibility; do you make your choices with your mind or with your heart?

I choose with my heart. I always have. I can reason around things. Think a lot, some times too much, over what to do, what choice to make. Good rational thinking. But in the end, what I base my choices on, is what I feel in my heart.

I sometimes call this the crash and burn method, because in many cases a big crash and a lot of burning is the end result. But to me, the worst thing would be to regret the things I didn't try. And the road down to crash and burn is filled with great adventures.

Sometimes I know that the road I'm on most likely will end with a crash. At some point down that road, it hits me. I can't explain it, I just know. I just know there is no way this can end well. Does that make me turn around? To take another road? So far I haven't.

I would like to think that I at least learn from the past. That I don't take the same damned road twice. But honestly, I'm not totally sure that I can say that either. I do think that I'll try to stand in front of the same road again. And I do think that I have experiences that could help me handle the situation better the second time around. But if I would avoid that road just because of fear for another crash? No, I don't think I will.

Maybe this makes me stupid. Or naive. Maybe this is the reason to that my life some times is screwed up, and that I am single, with my fair amount of heart brake in my luggage. Maybe I do need to be a little bit more rational, and not only follow my heart. I can accept that. But I can not accept people that are the total opposite. People that only follow the rational, the sensible. People that are so careful that they don't even try when the chance comes along. Chances for good things don't come very often, so how can you ration away something that could be good? I am honestly asking, because that just doesn't make sense to me.

This is my life.

I’d go down the beaten track, along the river with an empty bag
At the end she said to me: “Why are you here with the autumn leaves?”

I’m done, tipping on my toes, strike an iron and attack my soul
Misty moon, you’re gonna see, I’ve got your blues to get on my feet

I don’t wanna run;
I don’t wanna fight
I don’t wanna hide;
I just wanna stay free, to be me
I don’t wanna win;
I don’t wanna lose
I don’t wanna play;
I just wanna remember, my name

‘Cause this is my life, my friend, and this is my time to stand
‘Cause this is my life, my friend, and I can’t be no one else

Team Edward vs Team Jake

It is time to step up, to choose sides. In the end there can only be one. Are you on team Edward or on Team Jake? In our household the standings after two movies are 1 for team Edward and 1 for team Jake. Feel free to show your colours in the commentaries.

Team Edward 1 - Team Jake 1

Keep the faith.

I don't believe in God. I am not a follower of any religion. But I do have faith. I have faith in people. I have faith in life. And I have faith in love. I have faith in that the capacity of the human is great. I have faith in that things in life have a way of working out. And I have faith in true love, in love that lasts a life time and that the possibility of this kind of love exist for everyone.

I think that no matter what you believe or have faith in there will come times when you're faith is weakened. You will doubt your beliefs and possibly also yourself. I would guess this is what religious people would consider as test of the faith. No matter what this is a difficult time and it could in worst case lead to a personal crisis, and the only way out of it is to regain you faith or turn away from it. If you do turn away from your faith in the end, I do think that you then have found another believe to help you view life from. I do believe that most of us have believes that we live with, and I do think that the very few that really don't believe in anything at all have problems with interpreting and dealing with the world.

So the question that I put on the table is how do you get from doubting you believe to stop doubting? How do you come out of the crisis? How do you regain the faith, or find a new believe system?

During last year I suffered from a life crisis. I was questioning the meaning of things for a long time and couldn't see the point of it all or even a way to find the next step. A big turn came when I realised that a big part of my crisis was because I had lost my faith in life, in that things work out, in that as long as you're living your life actively one thing will lead to another. When I realised my lost of faith I sat down and considered if this was something I still believed, and came to the conclusion that it is. That I do still believe in these things, but that my lost of faith cam from forgetting what my beliefs are. This realisation helped my finding my faith again, and this helped my getting back on course and getting out of a dark period.

In just a few months things have really turned around for me and I have so many great new things and new people in my life. But I am still in doubt of some of my beliefs, and it is hard. In one way I have to keep holding on to my faith, otherwise I'll fall handlong. On the other hand I am not sure if I can keep believing, but if this is not my believe, then what is?

I am divine.

The second rape.

A 14 year old girl gets raped in a school toilet, during a normal school day. The rapist is a 16 year old boy who is good looking and popular at the school. The girl goes to the police, and the boy gets convicted for rape in court. One part of the evidence is a recorded confession that the boy has made to the police, where all details are the same as in the girls story. The whole village where they both live take sides for the boy. Rumours are spread about the girl being "easy", or that she liked him and when he rejected her she reported the rape in revenge. Barely anyone finds it likely that this boy would commit a rape.

The kids at the school are bullying the girl on daily basis. She gets dirty words thrown in her face when she passes old friends by, or she is totally ignored. On the internet support groups are founded to support the boy, to free him of all convictions, and to get him back to the school after he is transferred to another school. The girl is considered a worthless lier that is ruining an innocent boys life.

Even worse than the kids are the grown ups in the village. The principal of the school, the leader of the after work activities and the village priest all decide to stay neutral in the question, they don't want to take anyone's side. Even after the boy is convicted. And none of them have acted in anyway against the hate campaigns that are taking place in the internet.

There are other grown ups making comments, and helping spreading the rumours about how the girl has been lying, how it should be impossible to force some one to perform oral sex or how the boy is such a great boy that can get any girls he want, so why would he need to rape someone...

The only story of all the stories flourishing that anyone has actually heard directly from the girl is the one she has also told the police. All the other stories have been told by a friend of a friend.

On the day of the school graduation the boy is attending another school and also has a restraining order on him forbidding him to be near the girl. The graduation ceremony is held in the village church. The girls mother decides to take the girl away on a trip, because she figures it might be a difficult day for her. On the ceremony the boy shows up and hands out flowers and hugs to all his former class mates and teachers in the church. The priest is very impressed with the boys behaviour and also proud that the church is open for everyone. When a reporter asks him if he didn't see a problem in that the girl might have been there and that the boy actually has a restraining order on him, the priest answers that he didn't know that. He didn't know that the boy was convicted, and he says that he actually didn't care to find out the verdict.

Later that night, the boy rapes a another girl. This time it is a completed. He also gets convicted in court for this rape.

The priests comments: "I feel sorry for the boy. ...and of course the girl".

The village still doesn't believe that the boy is a rapist.

Now both girls are attacked as sluts and liers.

This happened in the north of Sweden. But I promise that this is not the only case like this. The image of the rapist is to narrow. A rapist can be anyone. It's not only ugly perverts that are sneaking around in the bushes and attacking girls on the way home in the middle of the night. A rapist can be that popular good looking guy who gets a lot of girls. A rapist can be anyone. But of course that doesn't mean that everyone is a rapist.

We grown ups need to stop thinking that being neutral is the best solution. Maybe this is very Swedish. We have stayed out of wars for a long time by playing the neutral card. But neutral is not good enough. We have to step up and take measures against those who are doing wrong! And to stand by the victims. Especially when the victims are kids!

The program about this incident is available to see here until the 9th of July (in Swedish only).

Tromsø.

I am a city girl, but that doesn't mean that I don't enjoy being in the nature. I am an active person and enjoy the outdoors (even though I do prefer it if it is possible to have a real shower and a real bed in the end of the day, nothing fancy, just a bed and a shower is enough). Swimming, hiking, skiing, snowboarding, biking... and all best enjoyed in a beautiful surrounding. Just watching a view of a beautiful landscape can be meditating. You can just feel your mind relaxing and your whole body is breathing in the beauty. I guess that's what they call breathtaking.Today I got a dose of breathtaking landscape. Mountains, fjords and snow in a fantastic mix!

Sunday treat.

The Girl Effect.

Involuntary father.

During the last months there has been a debate going on at a Swedish tabloid's online version about pregnant women's right to alone decide about the faith of the baby. The debate originated from a readers e-mail to one of the bloggers of the site. The reader was in a problematic relationship when she discovered she was pregnant, which according to her was not planned at all. I don't remember the exact detail of what had happened with her, if they just broke up or if her boyfriend left when she told him about the pregnancy, but the bottom line was he didn't want this child and he was now out of her life. Her problem now was that she really wanted a baby, and was therefore wondering if it was okay to keep this one, that was already growing inside her.

I followed some of the debate and some of the comments and responses to this post was shocking to me. So many women told her that of course she could keep it. That of course it was normal that she wanted a child. And why should she suffer, and give up this child, just because the father didn't want it. Just because the father was an irresponsible basterd that just took off. All power to the women! Screw the stupid men! (Okay maybe a bit over the top, but some comments were quite aggressive).

This way of thinking is really shocking to me.

I do think that women should have the power over their body!
I do think that abortions should be legal and free and that it shall be possible for a women to have an abortion with no questions asked!
I do think that there should be good and safe medical care for pregnant women everywhere, it should be safe both to have an abortion as well as to give birth!

So yes, I do agree that the power of deciding the faith of an unborn baby lies with the women. BUT with great power comes great responsibility! A baby is conceived by two people (and I am not taking rapes in to this discussion, because that is another discussion). I do believe that those two people have the equal rights and responsibilities regarding their baby! And it is up to the woman to make sure that the father gets access to those right and responsibilities, she has the power.

And if you as a woman can't care less about the father of your child. If you think that he's a jerk and just don't give a shit about him and his rights, then at least think about the child! Who are you to decide that a mother is enough? Who are you to bring a child in to this world, that has a father that doesn't wants it? How are you going to explain that to you child?

I understand the want for a child. I understand that it might feel convenient to just keep the child that is already created. But I am claiming it is not the right way. There are other ways to have a child as a single mother. There are insemination or adoption. Yes it will take time, and energy and some money. But that child will be wanted and loved. The right way is not necessarily easy.

It is important to remember both parents parts in a pregnancy and not for women use the power they have, just because they can.

Also there are two very good articled related to this, published in a Swedish magazine yesterday:
"Kvinna - tänk dig att tvingas bli mamma"
"1 av 25 pappor fick barnet mot sin vilja"

Valentine.

February 14th. Valentines Day. The international day of love? Or a day of commerce forced on to us by the American corporations? In general I think that any reason to celebrate is a good one, so sure if you want to take the opportunity to celebrate you're loved ones today, go ahead. But for me it is to much expectations and forced actions connected to this day. In a way I can draw a parallel to how I feel about New Years Eve. Valentines day has become something that you have to recognize. Imagine not doing anything for your partner this day? There are a lot of people out there that would feel very forgotten and neglected. But come on! How fun is it to get flowers, a dinner, a gift or a 6-pack of Carlsberg's (or what ever it is that makes you feel appreciated and loved), because your partner felt he or she had to give them? Even if it isn't only the thought that counts, it does count a lot! It is the unexpected gift, on a random day, that says "Hey beautiful, I was thinking about you today" that really means something. That's the gift that's going to put a smile on your face, that's going to make you feel loved and special.

Friends.

Not much in life can give you such a high as hanging out with good friends! The choices I've made for my life comes with a fact of having my friends in many places around the world, and some I don't get to see that often. That moment you finally get to be together, to give that beloved friend a long hug, that is just a magical moment. And with a true friend it doesn't matter how long time it's been since the last time, you just know that you are loved - just the way you are!

With my darling Lina-babe

Me and Tompa

My beautiful Sofie!

The two sides.

Is there a good and a bad side to everything? I think that it mostly is. There are downsides that comes along with the good things, and it is possible to see something good with most bad things. I have during the last years developed a lot, I have grown as a person and in some ways blossomed, as my dear uncle T once said, and one thing that I have developed is my spontaneous side. I am naturally a very planning and controlling person and this of course affected my life. I came to a time and a place in my life when I really wanted to change this. I wanted to be able to change the way I was stuck with plans already made. I wanted to be able to go with the opportunities that come along and through that get to experience new fun things. I made it a goal and I developed strategies to actively work on this part of my personality. And it succeeded. I am still me, I am still a very good planning person, but I have developed a spontaneous side too. But there is that down side to it. I am much more spontaneous. I do go for the opportunities that come along. And they have lead to loads and loads of new experiences. And I am not gonna say that some of them were bad, that's not really right, but some of them where really not to smart. This is the consequence of throwing the planning and over thinking out the window. And I do accept that consequence. I believe in the saying that it's better to regret the things that you did, than to regret the things you didn't do. Even though I don't believe in regrets. I believe in learning from your past and try to not to make the same less smart choice twice. And a life lived to the fullest, and that's what I'm working on.

Beautiful snow.

I walked through the dark and cold January night, late last night or maybe early this morning. Heading home, towards the warmth of my bed. The snow was falling over Copenhagen. Heavy, beautiful snow was covering every part of the city. Real snow, the beautiful kind. The kind of snowing that appears when it is really cold. Big, dry, snowflakes where falling, so many that they are covering the whole sky when you are looking up. The intensity of the falling is great, but the flakes seems to hoover more than actually fall. And the snowflakes land on the ground, on you, but not with the sticky wetness that they have when it is around 0 degrees. In the great cold they are almost dry, they are like feathers falling through the sky. And it is beautiful. And to be part of that beautiful makes me feel full of grace, and always makes me smile.

The finder.

Some times it scares me how easy it is to find people, and find out things about them on the internet. With Facebook and Google it is possible, at least for me, to find almost anyone, just by having a first name and some very basic information. I found one friend on Facebook by googeling his first name together with the country he's from. That way I found his blogg, and there I got the full name and could easily find him on Facebook, where he had a open page. And all of the sudden you can know more about someone you just met then you might want to. Then the question is when do you revel what you know? And of course, can you even trust that what you know actually is true? After all what you've seen is just one, electronic presentation about the person, where the person has been in control of what is presented.

Fun.

Something funny for fans of Swedish rock star Dregen and the Millenium books/movies by Stieg Larsson. Even though it would have been hilarious with Noomi Rapace/Lisbeth Salander as the bride, I think she looks so much like Dregen.

I like.

I really like this blog. I love the way she writes. So much that I wish it was me. Damn it.

Long day.

9 pm and I'm exhausted. After waking up at 4.30 this morning I feel that it's an acceptable feeling. And not just waking up early, but getting ready and looking nice, flying off to Oslo, spending 3 hours at the airport waiting for a meeting (and 3 hours is a perfectly great time to work up a pile of nervousness), having a meeting about a job that seems really really interesting trying to make a great impression, waiting some more, flying back home, cleaning the apartment and then rightfully collapse on the couch. As a Dane would say, puha.

Now crossed fingers about the job and getting ready to sleep.

Sick. Again.

I'm not really getting along fully with my body lately. After problems with my knee and some other stuff during the fall I now seem to be getting sick again and again. I started the year with fever and then never really got well. I have been tired, my nose is running and have just not felt totally well. And now, when I am supposed to start my new interesting course, the fever is back, with stomach pains as company. Just my luck. I don't know how many times I have gotten sick for new starts. For new jobs and new courses. A bit strange actually. It is frustrating to be stuck at home, missing out on the thing that you've been looking forward to start with, as well as missing all the introductions and then having to spend the first days super confused trying to catch up. But the one thing I have learned during my years is that there are no short cuts to getting well. You can't cheat on you body. And the one thing that you do need to keep on living is a healthy body. So that's the priority. Health comes first.

But I do very much hope that I will feel good enough tomorrow.

Family time.

My family means the world to me. We don't always get along. Some times I feel like I am an alien and that they don't understand me at all. Some times I wonder how people can be so different but still have some kind of basic togetherness that ties us to each other. And some times we just have a lot of fun. Since we are spread all over nowadays it's not that often that all of us get together. But we actually managed for a few days last weekend. Some beers, talks and laughs with my brothers in Cph was really great!

A start.

Even though I am not a fan of New Years Eve-celebrations I can't help to feel that a new year sets a new start in a way. To contemplate over the events of the previous year and look forward to new adventures in the upcoming one is quite natural I think, at least it something I can't keep myself from doing. Around the new year is not the only time I look in to my life, where I've been and where I'm going, but I for sure usually also do it around this time.

My feeling about 2009 is that it is an old snake skin that that I am now stepping out of. And the sensation I get when doing so is a great one. There are still some old scales that are stuck on my new fresh skin. The will eventually fall off as well. I am looking forward to leave them all behind, but all in it's own time. What's most important is that it is just a skin that I have stepped out of. The core is me. I sometimes forget. I get lost under old scales, ripped and scared by weather and wind. But I am still there, underneath it all. And I can rise again, beautiful and strong. I need her now. The beautiful and strong one. I need her for 2010 because I have decided this year is going to be my year.

One year ago I had high hopes for 2009, I had a good feeling. Nothing turned out in any way I expected or even would have guessed. In some ways it was one of my toughest years ever. But I've also had some amazing times and met some amazing people and made all these great new friends. One year ago I couldn't even imagine the things I would experience in just one year. And I find that absolutely amazing. And I am sure that I can't in no way guess or imagine all the experiences that 2010 will bring. The only thing I know is that it is important that I get that beautiful, strong me out, and bring her along for the ride. We are ready to embrace the adventures that will come!